....So there I was in a shitty town, living in the WORST apartment ever, with a crazy boyfriend and without a job. Good start. I got a job at a flower shop, I lied and said that I had worked in a well known flower shop back in Canada. I actually bluffed it pretty well, but I hated it. Its really really cold working in a flower shoppe, and people are ridiculous about their flowers. Although I didn't work at the restaurant anymore, Julie and I still hung out. She had been in the town for about a year before me. She was going to the local college. So she introduced me to her friends.
While I was at the flower shoppe I had applied for a management position with an Irish charity company, they were opening a store in crappytown. I got the job. It was the first "real" job I ever had. Since it was a charity shop, we relied on volunteer work and that was my main role, to get people to work for free!
Julie was a huge help. She came in every Saturday and on afternoons she didn't have class. Alan even came in every so often to help, and mostly to talk, talk, talk to everyone who came in.
One day this tall handsome guy came in to speak to someone about volunteering. He said he wanted to come in 3-4 times a week to help out. I was very confused as to why this good looking guy in his late 20's would want to spend his free time volunteering in a charity shop with middle aged woman? He told me he was a writer and needed to get out of his house and clear his mind from his writing. Ed started the next day. It didn't take long for Ed, Julie and I to become really good friends, and even a shorter amount of time for Alan to become extremely jealous. I was finally making friends and being invited out with people and getting know other people. I tried to include Alan every time, but he always declined. I was sick of not having a life and felt it was his choice to not have one, but I wanted nothing to do with. Once I got to know more people, the crappytown didn't seem so crappy anymore. I was having fun-except for when I was home with Alan.
I had been away from home for about a year and half at this point. It was coming up to Christmas and I was really missing my family so I decided to go home for the holidays. I was home for 10 days and was so happy to be away from Alan. I knew that when I went back, I was going to have end things for good. I had tried several times before but I was always talked back into staying. I knew this time though, I would have to have a plan if I was going to end things for good.
I remember my first day back, I was so homesick, jet legged and sad. I decided to go to the mall for some "cheering up". This "mall" I was going to consisted of a Tesco, Penny's, and a mobile phone shop. As I was crossing the street to get to the "mall", my mind was filled of thoughts of how to get out of the relationship with Alan. I was not paying attention and crossed the street without looking. A car came within centimeters of hitting me. I was frozen in the middle of the street, I could not move. The streets were filled with people shopping and everyone stopped and stared. The woman who's car I was standing in front of rolled down her window and yelled: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING YOU STUPID CUNT"?!?!?
I'll tell ya, that sure as hell un-froze me! My eyes burst with tears and I ran into the mall and went to the public washrooms to compose myself.
The first person I ran into when I came out of the washroom was Julie. We hugged and chatted for ages. She told me that she really wanted to move out of the house she was living in, she wasn't getting on with her roommate and she was looking for a new one. That was it! That was my plan! I told her that I would move in with her and she took it from there.
She found an amazing new apartment in a nice area and we signed the lease for February 1st. Now all I had to do was tell Alan. I can't say he took it well, but it went just as I expected. He cried and begged and screamed. Then he said that he would rather be dead...so he left the flat and didn't come back until the next day. He slept in the car. But he wanted me to think that he killed himself. He had done this to me many times before. This time I knew was no different from the rest. I slept so well that night, knowing that I wasn't going to have to sleep there anymore.
I remember the night when the relationship was finally ENDED. Julie, her boyfriend Erik, Ed and I had planned to go to Kilkenny for the upcoming long weekend. I had a big crush on Ed, and I knew he had one on me. I also knew that I had to be clear to Alan that things were completely over between us. I didn't want anything to happen between Ed and I unless I knew that Alan knew that we were O-V-E-R. I went over to his place to collect the last of my things. It was the same thing again, collapsing on the floor crying, begging...like literally begging...holding on to my legs. I pushed him off of me and I left. I walked down the cobbled street on a rainy February night. I could hear Alan calling my name from the top apartment window above Francis st. Pub, and I never looked back. I could feel myself growing up in that very moment and I knew everything was going to be OK.
It's funny, we went to Kilkenny that weekend and nothing happened between Ed and I. Nothing more then a kiss on the cheek. And nothing ever did happen, except we became great friends. But it was the hope of something happening and the support of Julie that really gave me the strength to cut of all ties with Alan.
It wasn't long after Julie and I moved in together that I got offered a position with Next, a UK retail company in Dublin. I didn't really know what do to. It was a great opportunity but I had just committed to a year lease with Julie.
Julie called our landlord and told her that someone in my family was dieing of cancer back in Canada and that I had to move back right away and would it be OK if she stayed at the apartment and continued to only pay her half of the rent! She agreed!
Julie and Ed helped me find a place to live on Saturday, on the Sunday I moved in and I started my new job on the Monday Morning.
I lived with two other girls in the outskirts of Dublin. I was working at the "Square, Tallaght" one of the doggiest areas in Dublin. The majority of the population was the "traveling community". I loved the job, and the 75% discount on the clothes was a huge bonus!
I went back on the weekends and stayed with Julie, or she would come down to Dublin. It wasn't long that I was in Dublin that Julie decided that she was going to change schools and come to Dublin with me. It was at the same time my cousin Angela decided to move to Dublin for a year too. It felt like my life couldn't get any better!
Julie decide to move in with a classmate until Angela came, then we would all get a place together. The summer before Angela came was the summer of parties! Julie and I went out every Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. I was living the true Dublin life.
One night we were at the Zanzibar club on the Quays, we were with a bunch of people who were buying us copious amounts of tequila and celebrating my friend Suzie's birthday. Everyone got separated and I decided it was time for me to go home. A very handsome guy stopped me at the door and started chatting me up. I was too drunk even for a conversation and politely declined any advances and walked home.
The next weekend we were back at the same place for another birthday celebration. This time I was completely sober, since I was completely broke from the weekend before. Julie and I also had a meeting the next morning to see a house to rent. I was dancing with a friend and I asked Julie to hold on to my hand bag. After I came off the dance floor we decided we should leave. We got outside and I realized Julie didn't have my bag. She thought I had it. We argued for a minuted about who should go back in and get it. I gave in and went back. On my way out the same handsome boy that stopped me the week before stopped me again. We were both much more sober then the previous week and we exchanged numbers. He told me his name was Shane and that he would like to take me out for dinner the next evening. I was very flattered to be pursued by someone so good looking, especially after being in a relationship with a "not so attractive" person (to say the least).
Shane and I spent the next 2 years together. The first year was exciting and fun and everything a good relationship should be. He came from a good family. He went to a private college in Dublin studying engineering and he played rugby for his school.
The second year of our relationship- the year before I moved back to Canada, consisted of lying, cheating, drug abuse and arrests....but that story is for another time....
................to be continued
